Zen Wisdom-
o Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone.
o The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt.
o It's always darkest just before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
o Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
o Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.
o Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
o If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
o Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
o If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
o Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
o If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
o If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
o Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.
o Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
o The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.
o A closed mouth gathers no foot.
o Duct tape is like 'The Force.' It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
o There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.
o Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.
o Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
o Never miss a good chance to shut up.
o Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
o Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone.
o The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt.
o It's always darkest just before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
o Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
o Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.
o Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
o If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
o Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
o If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
o Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
o If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
o If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
o Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.
o Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
o The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.
o A closed mouth gathers no foot.
o Duct tape is like 'The Force.' It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
o There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.
o Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.
o Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
o Never miss a good chance to shut up.
o Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
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